Virgie Bell's View: Bag Lady

I wonder if everyone gets as tired of the absolute bull that goes on in politics as I do. I realize that I keep up with that kind of stuff more than most people. This also proves I need to get a life, as the saying goes. It is absolutely the hardest thing to find a subject that does not involve these same old wind-bags.

Thinking back, politics has ruined what little life I had. I used to love to go to the movies, and politics has ruined that. I was a great admirer of Barbra Streisand. Incredible voice, wonderful actress, yet she can't keep her mouth shut about her political ideas and telling mere mortals how we should vote. Now, admittedly, she has much more inside information than poor little me. I never got to sleep in The Lincoln Bedroom (with or without the Pres is still to be determined). Sleeping with the Pres for Barbra types was more or less like S&H Green Stamps back then; they came with the purchase. I loved those stamps. I drooled over all the stuff in those catalogs. De'on and I used to go to the redemption center in Littlefield. In fact my hard sided Samsonite Luggage came from there. Big pieces, little pieces, hat boxes and shoe toters. Thing is, I never got to take a trip to use them. S&H Green Stamps did not give trips.

I saved those stamps for years and when I saw that Marlboro gave trips as well as luggage, I felt things were looking up for me. Jerry and I filled an entire closet full of empty packages in order to try to look healthy and wealthy a la Marlboro Man. Of course, hard Samsonite luggage was a joke by then. Here I stood at the baggage claim and everyone else had these soft very used luggage things and slung them over their shoulder and took off lickity-split to the busy lives they rushed to. Here I stood in high heels and pantyhose, dressed to the nines and I actually heard snickers about that. When I stepped forward to claim that new hard-shell Samsonite, the crowd openly jeered. I even caught some Japanese tourists taking pictures. I was never so embarrassed in my life. You can see then, dear reader, why I felt Marlboro Luggage was a life saver for me. No more pale blue suitcases, but bright red, and so here I go with the in-bunch...those hardies that wouldn't be caught dead in pantyhose. It was denim for me and the smoking crowd...we really are more fun anyway. Then wouldn't you know we became the slugs and worms of the proper crowd. Well, by now, I did realize what I should do as far as luggage in Baggage Claim. Things like massive beat-up tote bags and hearty backpacks with ratty looking jeans and T-Shirts which proclaimed some message to someone somewhere and in effect saying, “Up your nose with a rubber hose." and “ I quit smoking." and there I stood in clean Levis and polished Ropers. Might as well have had on a tee shirt that said “I shoot whales and kick puppies and I smoke cigarettes.” It was the same thing. The entire same thing.

A one-time First Lady of New Mexico declared the Capitol Building a No Smoking area. She said, “I am a mother and this is about children.” This means, I suppose, that I kick babies as well as puppies. She was younger than me but died a few years ago. This, after the governor broke up with her for a squeeze who didn't give two hoots and a holler about anything on two legs that didn't climb some summit somewhere. The ex-Governor cried in public and proclaimed, “I have lost my best friend.” Best friend. Huh!

Finally, I give it all up and get a motor home. Then I find out Ms. Streisand tools around town in her motor home in order to avoid a public restroom while our motor home can be seen in the free parking area at the Hospital of the Week. We are almost the latest craze. Smokers who have out lasted everyone else are despised for the very fact that we did not embrace trees but supported tobacco farmers. This is a political world and the movies offer no escape. You know what. I really hate Barbra Streisand for contributing to my misery. I hate Oprah for telling us how to vote. I just hate this season, don't you?

SUPPORT THE TROOPS!