Virgie Bell's View: The Dem's Constant Candidate

I promised the readers of this blog that I would look for positive things to say about the Democratic candidates. Today I looked at the line-up in the last debate of these worthies and not so worthies. In a rare moment of inspiration I thought to myself, they are all taller than Hillary. I know we are looking at crumbs from the table but hey, you got to start somewhere. But then on a closer look I noticed that no, they're not all taller than Hillary. Dennis Kucinich is not taller than Hillary.

Today I would like to discuss old Dennis. You are aware of him I’m sure. He is the constant candidate for the office of President. Here is the thing about being a candidate. It is a very nice way to make a living. It used to have its drawbacks because of the short seasonal work it entailed. You had to really take care of your day job, so to speak. This is no longer true. It is a full time job even if there is a term limit of two terms on the office of President. You can run and run and run, even if you lose and lose and lose.

Now Dennis is just about the most uninspiring man you could ever hope to meet in this life. He became a divorced man a few years ago, putting him into the running as one of the most eligible bachelors in America. All it takes to become a member of this elite list is to be single and a Washington political insider. If you are Bill Clinton, then of course, the single doesn't matter. All that is required of him was for a young and hip intern to acquire her presidential knee pads and you are off and running. Well scratch that. You can not run in knee pads. But back to Dennis Kucinich. Just a couple of years ago there was a contest for some lucky woman to be treated to a breakfast with this dashing Senator. The good sport, the true Senator that he was, he adhered to the rules that he had to take this fortunate woman to eat. He seemed to be pretty perturbed with the winner. She was a pretty good looking woman as far as I could tell and she was so excited after this treat. She said she found old Dennis fascinating. Well that was the end of her hopes and dreams to capture this prize of a man.

I had looked for splendid surroundings from the Senator. Some place to hold a political sound bite and picture in order to run again for president. No such luck. It was held in the cafeteria there on the Capitol grounds, not to be confused with cafeteria where the big dogs go to eat, or Dog Goddesses go to eat. It had the least charming surroundings you could ever hope to find. Your local McDonald's has more splendor. What a let-down for me, the one who is forever salivating for the next tidbit into the life and times of that romantic list of bachelors, or Non-Bachelors as the case may be.

Years later there was some function where this little devil was in attendance. That little charmer was immediately captivated by a British gal of the hippie persuasion—a tall good looking gal with many body piercings. She wears a stud in her cute little tongue. He picked up the phone and called someone, Lord only knows who his friends and acquaintances really are. Willie Nelson supports his candidacy and would be a runner up in a look alike contest if it were held today in honor of this dashing Senator. After all, there is nothing that is more of a turn-on for a woman than that old MasterCard crossing the palm, as long as it has an unlimited allotted $ amount to it. Anyway, the Senator called this friend...maybe Jimmy Carter. I think there is special club for these dashing men. I really don't know about that though. All I know is that youth is a big plus for the club of the most un-handsome men on the planet. These three are surely at the top of the list. If Jimmy would lose Roseland, he might just qualify for full membership in the un-inspiring men’s club of America. Blah.

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